The Great Cat Flap, Flap!

As time has passed I have grown a bit of a comfort zone around my waist. Yes, I admit it. I tend to move at a more easy going pace nowadays and the tummy, well it's pleasingly round. In fact, on the underside it's as though the cat flap makers used it as a standard of measurement. I slide through with just the hint of a rasp of fur on plastic. I mention this because yesterday, contrary to my self-image, I discovered I'm actually much slimmer than I thought.

I have to explain also that I've always had a quite dramatic reaction to human sneezes. I can't help it. Most human sneezes make leap to my feet even from a deep sleep. I tell myself it's because that sneezey, shooey noise is just like a surprise warning from some enemy cat and I'm merely showing my super alertness. Well, you have to be ever ready, don't you! Anyway, Mr Housemaster has a particularly spectacular sneeze. It's like a train bursting out of a tunnel and ends with a long chooo! I never know when it's coming and when it does, no matter what I'm doing or where I am, I instinctively leap a foot in the air and head for the cat flap at the gallop. Gosh, I can feel the blood rushing round my ear drums at the thought!

Now, we get to yesterday. Quite a nice sunset. Pink sky. Tea time. As we often do when waiting for pussy-num-nums (sic.Peter Sellers - The Party - Birdie num-nums) Millhouse and I were sitting side by side looking out of the cat flap patiently waiting.
Suddenly, to my horror, Mr Housemaster sneezed! You can guess my reaction. I was going to bash my way through that cat flap even if it was locked shut. I sprang into action like an athlete at the starting pistol. As if that wasn't enough of a surprise, Millhouse was so startled by my reaction that he made for the cat flap at exactly the same instant. Two furry heads, four flattened ears, two round furry tummies, four back legs and two tails clattered through that one tummy sized hole together. And we made it in one shot! So really, I'm not far off a size zero after all. Perhaps my rotundity is just fur. Hmm, I'd like to think so.